Thursday, September 05, 2013

Changes and trusting

My little girl got on the bus yesterday for her first day of school.  I thought sending the first one off was supposed to be the emotional experience, but I feel like this year's been harder than last.  Don't get me wrong - I have to be completely honest and say that part of me has been really looking forward to the kids going to school.  I'm getting really tired of them always complaining that they're bored.

But then it hits me how much of a change this is.  How I'm going from three kids home all the time down to just one.  How I'm not going to be as much of an influence in my kids' lives anymore - especially Reuben going every day to grade 1 now.  How I have to learn to trust God more than ever as I let these pieces of my heart walk out that door into the wide unknown - a wide unknown that has such potential to cause great hurt.

It's hard not to worry about what might happen to them when I'm not there to make sure they'll be safe.  I have to put them in His hands and rest knowing that He'll carry them through the joys and the hurts.  All part of this thing called "parenting"...

(Side note: I had more thoughts, but my brains has suddenly shut off and the children are getting restless ie. Nathan wants breakfast, so that's it for now...)

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